Jokes

Laughter All The Way….

Advice. *Not bad*

Posted by @ B H i on January 22, 2007

o Behind every successful man there is a great woman and behind every great woman there is a smart guy staring at her butt.

o If you don’t believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.

o Opinion is like an ass hole, everyone has one.

o Avoid rape – say yes.

o A mistress lies between a mister and a mattress.

o The game of love is never called off on account of darkness.

o Thou shalt not commit adultery…unless in the mood.

o The best thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to talk afterwards.

o Learn from your parents’ mistakes – use birth control.

o Assassins do it from behind.

o Chess players mate better.

o Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.

o Good girls spit, Bad girls swallow, Naughty girls gargle.

o Excuses are like asses everyone’s got em and the all stink.

o Squirrel who runs up woman’s leg do not find nuts.

o If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put you between F and CK.

o Sex is the price women have to pay for marriage. Marriage is the price men have to pay for sex.

o When I was born, I got a choice- A big dick or a good memory. I am not able to remember, what did I choose.

o Never assume. It makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me”.

o Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

o My wife is a sex object. Evertime I ask for sex,she objects.

o Impotence: Nature’s way of saying “No hard feelings”.

o If you think sex is a pain in the ass, you’re doing it wrong.

o Her kisses left something to be desired — the rest of her.

o Good girls go to heaven…but bad girls go EVERYWHERE!!.

o Sex is an emotion in motion.

o For sale : Twin beds, one hardly used.

o There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men – don’t and stop, unless they are used together.

o Anatomy is something everybody’s got, but sure looks better on a woman.

o The difference between a husband and a lover is the difference between day and night.

o If he won’t wear a condom, staple his willy at the end. That’ll make him think. Sorta….

o I was so poor growing up … if I wasn’t a boy … I’d have had nothing to play with.

o Love without sex is like cooking without eating, but be careful because sex without condom is like driving a car without breaks!.

o I love you in blue. I love you in red but most of all. I love you in bed.

o The most enjoyable form of sex education is the braille method.

o Prostitution is a hole sale business.

o Lets all be considerate towards animal and let all the cocks meet the pussies of their choice.

5 Responses to “Advice. *Not bad*”

  1. Anonymous said

    chanu cudgay

  2. […] Advice. […]

  3. you can have twin beds at your home specially if you always spend your night with a special someone *`:

  4. Carroll said

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