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Archive for the ‘Hindi’ Category

Kids in school think quick

Posted by @ B H i on June 3, 2007

TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria!

___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.”

___________________________________________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!

___________________________________________________________

TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell “crocodile?”
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L”
TEACHER : No, that’s wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it’s H to O!
___________________________________________________________

TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with “I.”
MILLIE : I is…
TEACHER : No, Millie….. Always say, “I am.”
MILLIE : All right… “I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.”

___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.”
___________________________________________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry
tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father
didn’t punish him?”
LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.
___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
___________________________________________________________
TEACHER : Clyde, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as
your brother’s. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it’s the same dog!;
__________________________________________________________
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.

Posted in Funny, Humor, Jokes, NIce Trick, School, School-College | 10 Comments »

Happy Holi To u In advance

Posted by @ B H i on March 3, 2007

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Posted in Bollywood, Current Issues, Friends, Friends-Fun, Funny, Hindi, Holi, Holidays & Celebrations, Indian, Life, Office | 20 Comments »

Funny Shayari : Funny Sher

Posted by @ B H i on March 2, 2007

Jise koyal samjhe, woh kauwa nikla, dosti ke naam par hauwa nikla,
Jo roka karte they humein sharab peene se, aaj unki jeb se pauwa nikla.

More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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Ek jaam ulfat ke naam, ek jaam mohabat ke naam. Ek jaam wafa k naam, puri botal bewafa ke naam, Aur pura theka doston ke naam

More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

 

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Gori Paan mat khaya karo,honto par lali ati hai.Gori Paan mat khaya karo,honto par lali ati hai.By god tere bharibharkam sharir ko dekh meri jaan chali jati hai.

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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kya hua jo usne racha li mehndi hum bhi ab shehra sajayenge, mujhe pata tha ki vo apne nasib main nahi, ab uski choti bahan ko patayenge.

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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Kya hua jo usne racha lee mehandi ,
Ham bhi ab sehra sajayenge”
“Mujhe pata tha ki vo apne nasib me nahi,
Ab uski chhoti bahan ko fasayenge.

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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E-Dost tu bhi likha kar shayari meri tarah
tera bhi naam ho jayega
log phekenge tujhpe ande aur tamatar
subah k nashte ka kaam ho jayega..

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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tere khoobsoorat aankhon mein aansoo achche nahin lagte
chaahe jitnaa bhi roye but kabhi sachche nahin lagte

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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Hosband Bola Biwi Se Good Night,Biwi Boli Yeh Kaise Good Night , Bhujao Light , Lun Karo Tight , Choot Se Karo Fight , Nikalo White , Agar Kaam Ho Right , To Bolo Good Night..

 More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

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Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha
to yaad aaya kuch to hua hai kuch ho gaya hai,
exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya
sab kuch alag hai sab kuch naya hai.

More Sher – o – Shayari at Shayari-E-Azam

PLZ DO VISIT THESE TOO

 

Posted in Friends, Friends-Fun, Funny, Girls, Hindi, Humor, Indian, Life, Love, Shayari | 466 Comments »

4th Comming Movies Of Year 2007

Posted by @ B H i on January 22, 2007

Guru

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TA RA RUM PUM

 

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CHEENI KUM

 

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NISHABD

 

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SHOOT OUT AT LOKHANDWAALA

 

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Read the rest of this entry »

Posted in Bollywood, Current Issues, Hindi, Indian, Information | 1 Comment »

Let’s hope this happens by year 2020!!

Posted by @ B H i on January 19, 2007

Year : 2020
Place: Two Americans at IBM, USA.

Currency Conversion Rate: Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-.

Alex : Hi John, you didn’t come yesterday to office?
John : Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.

Alex : Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become very strict.
John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.

Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?
John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. Thats why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm.

Alex : Really? In India, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA
John : Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested in coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.

Alex : So, when are you leaving?
John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of dream come true.

Alex : How long are you going to stay in India.
John : What do you mean by how long. I will be settled in India, my company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta.

Alex : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara Patta in India.
John : Yeah, thats why, I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.

Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Hyderabad, Bangalore and Mumbai.
John : But, I prefer Indian girls because they are beautiful and cultured.

Alex : Where did you get the offer, Hyderabad?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite high, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.

Alex : I see, that’s too much for US people, Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-. Oh God! What about in Chennai, Mumbai?
John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Hyderabad. It is like the world headquarters of Software.

Alex : I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal Robot for help.
John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal Robot for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase Ambassador, which costs Rs.200000/- but has got a sexy design.

Alex : By the way, who is you are client?
John : Reddy and Naidu Associates, a pure Indian company, specializing in Embedded Software.

Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened  their Fly-by-night outfits in India. Indian companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar, the most livable place in India, probably world. There you  have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.
John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps.

Alex : How are you going to cope with their language?
John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Hindi as my first language here at New York. At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Hindi and were quite impressed by my cent percent score in TOHIL i.e. Test of Hindi as International Language.

Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.
John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world’s fastest train, world’s largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can see actors like, Hrithik, and all. Esselworld is also near to Bollywood.

Alex : You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.
John : That’s true. Last month, Narayanamurthy visited White House and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City of Hyderabad.Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.

Alex : But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthy’ s Infosys.
John : He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Infosys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.

Alex : OK, Good Luck John.
John : Same to you Alex. And don’t go to Consulate in a Kurta Pyjama because  they will think you are too Indianised and may doubt you will ever come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don’t forget to say “Namaste, aap kaise hai” to the Visa officer at Window 5.  It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if you don’t greet him that way.

Posted in Analysis, Friends, Funny, Hindi, Indian, Information, Office, Random Thoughts | 3 Comments »

Some Childhood Classics (Hindi wale)

Posted by @ B H i on November 12, 2006

Machhali Jal ki Rani hai
Jeewan uska paani hai
hath lagao darr jayegi
bahar nikalo mar jayegi…

 

Posham pa bhai posham pa
sau(100) rupay ki ghadi churayi
ab to jail mein jana padega
jail ki roti khana padega
jail ka pani peena padega
thayi thuiya thush
madari baba fushhhhhh….

 

Jhooth bolna paap hai
nadi kinare saanp hai
kali mai aayegi
tumko utha le jayegi…

 

aaj somvar hai,
chuhe ko bukhar hai
chuha gaya doctor ke pass
doctor ne lagayi sui
chula bola ooooiiiii

 

aalu-kachalu beta kaha gaye the
bandar ki jhopdi mein so rahe the
bandar ne laat maari ro rahe the
mummy ne paise diye has rahe the

 

titlee udi,bus mein chadi
seet na mili ,to rone lagi
driver bola aaja mere pass
titlee boli “mein chali akash”

 

chanda mama door ke
puye pakaye bhoor ke
aap khaye thali mein
munne ko de pyali mein

 

akkad bakkad bumbe bol
80-90 pure 100
100 mein laga dhaga
chor nikal ke bhaga…

 

raja ki raani soti thi
moti ki maala boti thi….

 

chadrakanta ki kahani
ye maana hai purani
ye purani ho kar bhi
badi lagti hai suhaani
naugarh vijaygarh main thi takrar
naugarh ka tha jo raajkumar
chandrakanta se karta tha pyar
chandrakanta se karta tha pyar…

 

budhe baba budhde baba
kahan jaa rahe ho
NADEE KINAARE
nadeee to ye rahi(pointing to the circle)
CHHOTI SI HAI
1 paisa daalo badi ho jaayegi
(baba 1 paisa daalta hai)
AB BHI CHHOTI HAI
1 paisa daalo aur badhi ho jaayegi

 

meri roti kisne khai
bhalu ne
bhalu to mere saath tha
haathi ne
haathi to mere saath tha
sher ne
sher bhi mere saath tha
hum ne…………..

Posted in Bollywood, Friends, Funny, Hindi, Indian | 4 Comments »

Nice kavita…

Posted by @ B H i on November 12, 2006

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Posted in Friends, Funny, Hindi, Indian, Jokes, School | Leave a Comment »

hindi Poem

Posted by @ B H i on November 9, 2006

मैं और मेरा रूममेट अक्सर ये बातें करते हैं,
घर साफ होता तो कैसा होता.
मैं किचन साफ करता तुम बाथरूम धोते,
तुम हॉल साफ करते मैं बालकनी देखता.
लोग इस बात पर हैरान होते,
उस बात पर कितने हँसते.
मैं और मेरा रूममेट अक्सर ये बातें करते हैं.

यह हरा-भरा सिंक है या बर्तनों की जंग छिड़ी हुई है,
ये कलरफुल किचन है या मसालों से होली खेली हुई है.
है फ़र्श की नई डिज़ाइन या दूध, बियर से धुली हुई हैं.

ये सेलफोन है या ढक्कन,
स्लीपिंग बैग है या किसी का आँचल.
ये एयर-फ्रेशनर का नया फ्लेवर है या ट्रैश-बैग से आती बदबू.
ये पत्तियों की है सरसराहट या हीटर फिर से खराब हुआ है.
ये सोचता है रूममेट कब से गुमसुम,
के जबकि उसको भी ये खबर है
कि मच्छर नहीं है, कहीं नहीं है.
मगर उसका दिल है कि कह रहा है
मच्छर यहीं है, यहीं कहीं है.

दिल में एक तस्वीर इधर भी है, उधर भी.
करने को बहुत कुछ है, मगर कब करें हम,
इसके लिए टाइम इधर भी नहीं है, उधर भी नहीं.

दिल कहता है कोई वैक्यूम क्लीनर ला दे,
ये कारपेट जो जीने को जूझ रहा है, फिकवा दे.
हम साफ रह सकते हैं, लोगों को बता दें

Posted in Funny, Hindi, Indian, Jokes, Life, School | 32 Comments »

Shuddha Hindi Meaning for some English words

Posted by @ B H i on November 9, 2006

CRICKET : Gol guttam lakad battam de danadan pratiyogita

CRICKET TEST MATCH : Pakad dandu, maar mandu, de danaadan pratiyogita

TABLE TENNIS : Lakdi ke phalak shetra pe Le takaatak de takaatak

LAWN TENNIS : Harit Ghaas par Le tada tad, de tada tad

LIGHT BULB : Vidyut Prakashak Kanch golak

TIE : Kanth Langoti

MATCH BOX : Ragdampatti Agni Utpaadan Peti

TRAFFIC SIGNAL : Aavat Jaavat Suchak Jhandaa

TEA : Dugdh Jal Mishrit Sharkara Yukt Parvatiya(pahaadi) Booti

TRAIN : Sahasra Chakra Louh Path Gaamini

ALL ROUTE PASS : Yatr Tatr Sarvatr Gaman Aagya Patr

RAILWAY SIGNAL : Loh Path Gamini Suchak Yantra

RAILWAY SIGNAL : Agni Rath Aava Gaman Soochak Pattika

RAILWAY SIGNAL : Louh path gaamini aawagaman suchak yantra

RAILWAY STATION : Bhabhka Adda

BUTTON : Ast Vyast Vastra Niyantrak

MOSQUITO : Gunjanhaari Manav Rakt Pipasu Jeev

CIGERETTE : Shweta patra mandit dhumra shalakha praveen.

Posted in Friends-Fun, Funny, Hindi, Indian, Jokes | 33 Comments »

Hey Krishna tu is kalyug mein aa kar to dikha …

Posted by @ B H i on November 8, 2006

Tune 18 saal ki umar me mama Kans ko mara,
BIN LADEN ko hath laga kar to dikha …

Tune Arjun ko to Saari Geeta sunayee,
Mere Project Manager se ek baar baat kar ke to dikha …

Tune to Arjun ka Sarathi banke Pandavon ko jitaaya
Indian Cricket team ka Coach ban ke WorldCup jitaake to dikha …

Tune bhari mehfil mein draupadi ko saree pehnai,
Mallika sherawat ko ek jodi kapde pehna ke to dikha …

Tune gokul ki 1600 gopiyan patai,
Meri company ki sirf ek ladki ko pata kar to dikha …

Hey Krishna tu is kalyug mein aa kar to dikha …

Posted in Analysis, Funny, Hindi, Indian, Jokes | 9 Comments »

 
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