Humour in Indian English

Tamil Nadu, India , well Known Personality,Mr Jeppier,Chairman of Self financing Engineering Colleges Association ,who is always speaking in English … Sathyabama college Students have Collected & published the Book on Jappier’s Spoken English … Njoy ………..with his…………..English………….. Sounds fictitious…although highly likely

Now, here are some classic English sentences from the great Mr. Jeppiar.

Mr. Jeppiar talks to his students:

# At the ground: —————– All of you stand in a straight circle. The girl with the mirror please comes her…{Means: girl with specs please come here).

# To a boy, angrily: ——————— I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk?

# While punishing students: ———————– You, rotate the ground four times… You, go and understand the tree… You three of you stand together separately. Why are y ou late – say YES or NO …..(?)

# Sir at his best: ————— Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance, he happened to see one of our boys at the theatre, though the boy did no t see them. So the next day at s school… (to that boy) – “Yesterday I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre”

# Sir at his best inside the Class room: ———————————————- Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in. Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in. Cut an apple into two halves – I will take the bigger half. Shhh…Quiet, boys…the principal JUST PASSED AWAY in the corridor You, meet me behind the class. (Meaning AFTER the class..) “Both of u three get out of the class.” Close the doors of the windows please. I have winter in my nose today… Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver….. Take 5 cm wire of any length….

Last but not the least some Jeppi ar experiences … —————————————————————– Once Sir had come late to a college function, by the time he reached, the function had begun, so he went to the dais, and said, sorry I am late, because on the way my car hit 2 muttons (Meaning goats).

At St. Josephs fresh years day 2003: ———————————————- “No ragging this college. Anybody rag we arrest the police”

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